Back Again

Ok so today is Monday and I have slowly ade the conversion to wireless Roadrunner at my house. Due to some technicle difficulties I have been unable to post these past few days. Friday I had my Chemistry Exam which followed Thursday's Caculus Exam. I got my Calculus grade back, and I got a 49.5% which is bad. The class aveage was a 60%, and she only curved it 10%. At my college you have to have a C in order to get credit and I currently have about 68% so I am close to passing, but still not there. This is really sad for me because I had to drop this same class last quarter because I couldn't pass it, and again this quarter I am already struggling. Dropping it again would kill my whole freshman year. If I don't pass it this time I'll have to go back and take Pre Calculus or something. I am really sad about this because I have worked really hard to do well. I don't know yet how I did on my Chemistry exam though I would imagine that I did ok. Today I have a Biology Exam, and tomorrow I have a Logic Exam. Each of those should be hard and based on the presnt trend that means I won't pass. In other news Friday night my Co-leader Brandon turned 25. We had a snow tubing party for him at Perfect North. It was lot of fun, but I just feel akward hanging out with the people that went. I was the youngest person there by at least 4 years. Lately I am just not confidant in myself as far as what I am doing or saying. Its like I can't get much right. Most of my friends are older, and are busy most of the time with their lives. Only three people I hang out with aren't in serious dating relationships. Oh well I guess my time will come as well. Ok now time to talk about the big issue of the week. My sister and my Dad ave been having this fight for a few months now because they both think each other was wrong and so my sister just stopped going over to his house. Well my Dad being the jealous, selfish, and childish man that he is still won't apologize to my sister. Instead of resolving the problem that way he chose to pull out the divorce paperwork and tell my sisster that if she doesn't come visit him more then he could have my mom put into prison for custody violation or something. This may or may not be true, but either way it seems like a rather scetchy way to go about forcing your daughter whos 17 to come visit you. So of coarse this came back to my mom later, and she was pissed. Now heres where the plot thickens. My dad doesn't really have anyone that he hangs out with. I mena he knows people and has friends, but no close friends that he talks to about this stuff. So he talks to me. This has been a problem throughout my childhood, that my dad would bring stuff to me that I have no business being told. He says awful things about my mother, and now he come out with all this stuff about Kate. Well I am completely frustrated with the stuation. I don't really know how to respond because I think my role in my family is to provide support and encouragement. That is difficult for me because I have a divided family. So who knows whats going to happen. Today is campainers and I have 50 cookies for the kids. In addition to that tonight is our big semester planing meeting. I guess it is good that I don't actually have to do anything this semester as far as devotionals for the group or give my testimony or anything. I mean its not a big deal to do that stuff, but its just one less thing I have to focus on. So we shall see what is to come...

Solution: Quit School and move far far away from my family, possibly to Florida, get a job as first mate on a fishing charter and become a devoute atheist, because life is much easier that way. (SIKE)


So I hope you all are doing better than me this week. Remember when I wrote about thatnkign God for the times when its easy because it usually isn't. I should have titled this Post "Exibit A"

in Him
matt

Basketball Game

Tonight I found out that the Mt Health Owls had a game about 5 minutes fom my house. This is very rare so I took it opon myself to make sure thatI attended the game. I got there around 5 and the freshman game hadn't ended yet. I got to see the freshman play while I tried to meet some of the varsity guys unsuccessfully. Its all good though because they only brought one bus so everyone had to stay and watch the JV and then the Varsity. This was great for me because it gave me an opportunity to sit with the freshman team and hang out. I met some really cool kids that just love to have fun no matter what. They got whooped in their game, but all they could talk about was all the fun they had messing with the other team. I remember 4 names and lots of faces. This will give me plenty of stuff to pray for. Also at the game I saw someone I knew. It was a lady from my subdivision growing up. I had known her as a child because she was one of the people you would always see at the pool or playing with her kids or whatever. Well as it turns out she recognized me and came to talk to me. When she asked me why I was there and I came back with the whole youth ministry thing she was overwhelmed. It was awesome to see the joy light up her face. Turns out swhe is a very devote Christian woman. She offered me anything that I could think of be it transportation, financial support, or dinner. She told me that she wanted to talk to me more and find out exactly what I was up too and that I should stop by her house some time to talk with her. Tonight was truely blessed. She also told me that her husband is looking for people to train int his chemistry oriented job at HIS plant. Basically the guy wants to hire me on this summer to work for him ppaying me huge dollars to do something I love and am not bad at. I was so excited on the way home I was shaking. God has a way of never letting me down. This is awesome. Despite how wonderful everything is there is still the roughness of my family and the 4 exams I have in the next 7 days...why is it that none of that stuff seems to be all that hard to face knowing that the God of the universe is beside me. So in the spirit of Eclessiastes 5:2, I'll let my words be few and peace out for tonight. I hope this message finds your well and joyfully filled with Christ.

in Him
matt

Satan is a Smart Demon

Today was a great day for me. I got a good score on the tests that I got back, and am sure that I did well on the Chemistry quiz that I took. After school I went to my Dad's house and had a good time there then I went to Kroger's where I picked up some more spagetti. After that I went to my first Campainers as a leader. It was awesome really. I made dinner for all the kids and then watched Sister Act 2 with them. It was great. After taking the kids home and doing the dishes we had a team prayer meeting which I love. I really feel supported by God and by my team when we all sit down together and talk with God. I love my team so much!!! I was just beaming on the drive home. So then I call my dad back because he had called me earlier, apparently he has had a big fight with my mom in front of my sister about whatever. In any case they are both angry and I am the go between. Times like these make me really thankful when things are easy. Once again I am on my knees begging for God to come and save me and make everything ok. I just want to be there to support my family, but how can I do that when they are so divided. All I can do now is just listen, I have no answers, there is nothing I can say ro do to make it better. All I have to offer is my personal consistancy to the family. Despite everything I remain steadfast in Christ. That is all I can be to my family. I am sure that God has a plan for this situation, I don't know what that plan might be, but I am sure that everything will be as he wants it to be. I find my shelter in the shadow of His wings and know that there is safety and comfort there. Even as I write this God is looking down on me protecting me and guarding me from evil. God I am so in love with you...

in Him
matt

Magic Monday

I have returned from Leadership Weekend. I am happy to tell you that it was a great experience for me. I don't exactly know how to put into words some of the feelings that I experienced the past few days, it was just amazing to sit in conferences on how to show Christ to high school kids while sitting across the table from people who had followed those steps to show Christ to me. To listen to how as a leader I would be rejected by high school kids, and how that would crush my self esteem and know that I had done many of those things to my leaders. I am begining to understand how hard Ed (my leader) had fought for my soul. It is an indiscribable feeling to know that someone cared about you enough to to give themselves for you. As Christ gave his life as a ransom for many Ed gave his life to the work of Christ and from Christ's direction in his life came my salvation. I am forever thankful to Christ and his awesome plan for my life.
In addition to all of that I also learned much about how to carry out an effective ministry in high schools. I learned strategies for meeting and setting the example for kids. I learned how to plan for team cohesiveness, and how to maximize the number of people our ministry reaches. I learned so many different leading strategies that I can't remember them all. Above all of this I learned that it is critical to have absolute dedication to and dependance on Christ. Without Christ I can do nothing, but with him I can do anything. I will undoubtedly fall flat on my face without Christ to hold me up. Alone I have nothing to offer the kids I am trying to reach, and only with Christ will I be able to change that. I am so excited to see where this ministry will take me in my walk with Christ. In conclusion I would like to say that this has to be one of the most unorganized things I have ever written. I am ok with this because I think it accurately depicts the excitement that I have now for the near future. God bless you all and have a wonderful day.

in Him
matt

Leadership Weekend

I apologize for the lack of posting this weekend due to my absence. I will be attending a Leadership Weekend in Kentucky for Young Life. As such I will not have access to or the desire to spend time away from my dear friends. I wish the best to you all and if you like my devotions you should check out my churchs daily devotionals at vinenet.net. Talk to you all on Monday with a full report. Oh and one last thing. Pray that the philosophy of "Meet your wife at Young Life" holds true.

In Him
matt

Today's Devotional

John Chapter 4

1Therefore when the Lord knew that the Pharisees had heard that Jesus was making and baptizing more disciples than John
2(although Jesus Himself was not baptizing, but His disciples were),
3He left Judea and went away again into Galilee.
4And He had to pass through Samaria.
5So He came to a city of Samaria called Sychar, near the parcel of ground that Jacob gave to his son Joseph;
6and Jacob's well was there. So Jesus, being wearied from His journey, was sitting thus by the well. It was about the sixth hour.

The Woman of Samaria

7There came a woman of Samaria to draw water. Jesus said to her, "Give Me a drink."
8For His disciples had gone away into the city to buy food.
9Therefore the Samaritan woman said to Him, "How is it that You, being a Jew, ask me for a drink since I am a Samaritan woman?" (For Jews have no dealings with Samaritans.)
10Jesus answered and said to her, "If you knew the gift of God, and who it is who says to you, 'Give Me a drink,' you would have asked Him, and He would have given you living water."
11She said to Him, "Sir, You have nothing to draw with and the well is deep; where then do You get that living water?
12"You are not greater than our father Jacob, are You, who gave us the well, and drank of it himself and his sons and his cattle?"
13Jesus answered and said to her, "Everyone who drinks of this water will thirst again;
14but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him shall never thirst; but the water that I will give him will become in him a well of water springing up to eternal life."
15The woman said to Him, "Sir, give me this water, so I will not be thirsty nor come all the way here to draw."
16He said to her, "Go, call your husband and come here."
17The woman answered and said, "I have no husband." Jesus said to her, "You have correctly said, 'I have no husband';
18for you have had five husbands, and the one whom you now have is not your husband; this you have said truly."
19The woman said to Him, "Sir, I perceive that You are a prophet.
20"Our fathers worshiped in this mountain, and you people say that in Jerusalem is the place where men ought to worship."
21Jesus said to her, "Woman, believe Me, an hour is coming when neither in this mountain nor in Jerusalem will you worship the Father.
22"You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews.
23"But an hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for such people the Father seeks to be His worshipers.
24"God is spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth."
25The woman said to Him, "I know that Messiah is coming (He who is called Christ); when that One comes, He will declare all things to us."
26Jesus said to her, "I who speak to you am He."
27At this point His disciples came, and they were amazed that He had been speaking with a woman, yet no one said, "What do You seek?" or, "Why do You speak with her?"
28So the woman left her waterpot, and went into the city and said to the men,
29"Come, see a man who told me all the things that I have done; this is not the Christ, is it?"
30They went out of the city, and were coming to Him.
31Meanwhile the disciples were urging Him, saying, "Rabbi, eat."
32But He said to them, "I have food to eat that you do not know about."
33So the disciples were saying to one another, "No one brought Him anything to eat, did he?"
34Jesus said to them, "My food is to do the will of Him who sent Me and to accomplish His work.
35"Do you not say, 'There are yet four months, and then comes the harvest'? Behold, I say to you, lift up your eyes and look on the fields, that they are white for harvest.
36"Already he who reaps is receiving wages and is gathering fruit for life eternal; so that he who sows and he who reaps may rejoice together.
37"For in this case the saying is true, 'One sows and another reaps.'
38"I sent you to reap that for which you have not labored; others have labored and you have entered into their labor."

The Samaritans

39From that city many of the Samaritans believed in Him because of the word of the woman who testified, "He told me all the things that I have done."
40So when the Samaritans came to Jesus, they were asking Him to stay with them; and He stayed there two days.
41Many more believed because of His word;
42and they were saying to the woman, "It is no longer because of what you said that we believe, for we have heard for ourselves and know that this One is indeed the Savior of the world."


John Chapter 4 starts off with the story of Jesus at the well with the Samaritan woman. The stage is set for by the introduction to the scene by John. Jesus is going through Samaria for a reason. Its not coincedental that Jesus is there, he just didn't do things that wheren't intentional. So here is Jesus and the passage says it is about the sixth hour which means it is about 12:30 in the afternoon. It would have been very hot at this time of day int hat area of the world. The other important information here is that no one should have been at the well at this time of day. The fact that the woman was there says that she was an outcast in her society because she didn't come to the well with eveyone else. So anyways back to the story. Jesus asks the woman for a drink of water. Dialogue continues after this and Jesus, as usuall, has a great effect on the woman he is talking with. It seems that he is surrounded by an aura of truth and honesty that instantaniously won people over. She is so dramatically impacted by there conversation that she tells people that Jesus told her everything she ever did. When Jesus identifies the woman for who she really is she is astonished and no longer questions that he is the messiah that he claimed to be. As she is out fetching the men in her life and probably other people from the town to come see Jesus, Jesus takes the opportunity to prepare his disciples for what is about to happen. First he tells them that he has "food that they know nothing about." This is where the NASB version of the bible blows out all the other bibles out there. In the NASB the verse says that "They are white for harvest." This is glossed over in most translations as "They are ripe for harvest." This was done because there is no white crop in that area. Later it was learned that the people who came to the well wore white robes. Jesus not onyl predicts his crucifixtion here, but int he same paragraph identifies to the disciples that he will prepare people for the teaching of the disciples. As was the theme of my last devotional we once again are the harvest workers. Jesus sows the seeds in the hearts of man, and it is our commision to reap that harvest for the Lord. The other thing Jesus drops in here is the messsage that we are just as likely to be the one who sows the seeds in people never to see the results of our labors. We could pray for someone for years and one day one person in passing might say God be with you, and the person converts. The key to being ok with this is to understand that it isn't about getting or seeing results it is about a personal dependance on God for your daily bread. Jesus says his food is to do the work of the one who sent him. That should be our sustanance as well. It is nice to reap because that takes no work, but there is a bigger reward for the person who works daily to do god's will. When the people fianly reach the well from the town Jesus teaches them and many of them convert to believers. Now it is not the teaching of Jesus that directly convinces these people to believe, but the testimony of the woman. God has done and continues to do many amazing things, but there is nothing so convincing, so attractive in all of nature as the life that has been breathed into a believer. It is shockingly obvious to poeple, the light of Christ is blinding to people in the dark. There is more to John 4, but i think that this story is enough to consume at one time. It is so amazing all that can be spoken about how Christianity works in so few sentences. In just 42 verses John outlines many different aspects of living as a believer. The role of the disciple, the follower, the leader, the sowwer, the reaper, the lost, the witness, and more are all described in detail in just one story. I hope this has been informational to you and not to dilluted by my rambling and disorganization to understand. It is an honor for me to write these things that you may know Christ better. I am so happy to be a tool.

in Him
matt

Exhaustion

Today was one of my longer days. It started and ended in the ormal fashion of school then drive then work then drive. Today was rather unusual in the matter of where I went when I got off work. I went to my friends house, who happens to be a long time Young Life guy and a current teacher at the college I attend. I love to hang out with this guy because he is the smartest person that I know. He really knows everything its insane. So anyways I called him up and went over to his house. we went to dinner at Skiline which was awesome. Then we went back to his house to talk about life and school and really nerdy things that wouldn't even make sense to most people. I showed him this logic that I have been struggling with so much and he seems to think it looks very similar to the proofs he did in graduate school Advanced Calculus. The other thing about Mike and probably the thing that makes him so smart is that he has read many many books. So he starts pulling out all these books and shows me a few tricks and whatnot but essentially he told me to go talk to the director of the department and find out what is up with my mad scientist proffessor. Tomorrow I will get to the bottum of all this nonsense. Tomorrow I also have a quiz in calculus that I hope to do well on and there really isn't any reason that I wont do well I am pretty sure that I know all the stuff we are doing currently. So I am very excited for that and then my final day of work then home to sleep because I don't have anything to study for on friday. The onyl thing I have to do all weekend is go on this Leadership Weekend for Young Life. They are so awesome because all you do is lay around all day and talk and sleep and be lazy. I'll take HW of course but it won't really get looked at. So that's all I have for today nothing really exciting. I promise tomorrow night to have another devotional posted on here. Oh also I am officially changing my mian text from the NIV to the NASB version of the Bible. I think it is a much better translation and it will help me to be more accurate in my understanding of God. Have a wonderful day and don't forget to pray hard.

in Him
matt

Proofs

Proofs suck. I onyl can say that because I have spent the better part of three hours now looking at this assignment for my logic class and I am only part of the way done with it. Worse even than that is my motivation for working on it now instead of tomorrow during my class break. I am quickly becoming convinced that everything that goes wrong in my life is caused entirely by me and usually for the same 2 reasons, either I am tryign to do something to glorify myself, or I am trying to do something that will make me appear better than I am. Thats relaly the same thing, but thats also relaly how it is. When ever I am arrogant I am trying to look good for others which shouldn't be importan to me according to galations 1:10. So anyways this is my latest predicament; I am above average in this Logic class I have been taking, so today when I was doing good at understanding the lecture I started to help other people in the class. Well I don't know if I made myself seem smarter than I really am or I just didn't look ahead enough, but I have been voted as the leader of this little study group tomorrow. I was looking at what I am supposed to help everyone with tonight and I don't knwo that I am confident enough in the work I have done to tell them all this is the way to do it. So thats my predicament. I guess the other thing is that I am major tired and will onyl gte 7 hours of sleep at best probably no actually at most 6 probably 5 and a half which is not good at all. Oh well I hope you all enjoy this, though I am starting to think that its just Annie.

in Him
matt

Paused

I hate waiting for things to happen. I understand that the wait serves a purpose and it is important to mentally prepare for big changes in your life and that time is helpful in that preperration, but at the same time I really don't liekto wait. I like it when things happen right away. When I try something new I want to be good at it right away. Now I am waiting in essence to start leading Young Life. I mean officially we start next monday. I am realyl anxious. This coming weekend we have a area Leadership Weekend where my team will be having its first official meeting. I am excited even for that. Oh well that's all I really have for today is that I am excited. Hurry time hurry...

in Him
matt

Ask and You Shall Recieve

I haven't yet had my quiet time today, but I will shortly. What is still begging my attention is something I read yesterday. I found in Luke 10 a story of the 72 messengers that Christ sends out into the world. It is very much parallel to a stroy in Matthew 10 about how Jesus sent out the 12 Apostles. In both cases he gives them basically the same Pep Talk.

"The harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field. Go! I am sending you out like lambs among wolves." (Luke 10:2-3)

What really sticks out to me here is the analogy of sending US "lambs" out into the "wolves." Like many things Christ says I think that this is some sort of parable. It has a special meaning about the relatinship of dependance on Christ for strength we should have as we go to do his work. This same analogy is elaborated on in Matthew when Jesus sends out the 12.

"I am sending you out like sheep amoung wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves." (Matthew 10:16)

As sheep in the field look to their sheperd for protection from the things in the world that would harm them we are supposed to look to Christ, our sheperd, for the protection and guidance we need. It is important that we find a balance between wisdom, which is neccessary for gaurding our hearts and minds in Christ, and vulnerability, which is neccessary in order to truely love someone. We are called to live life in an odd way in which we have offered ourselves as sacrafices to the world and its wolves, surviving only on the trust and faith in Christ that we will be protected. Like the Jews fleeing from Egypt everyday when they woke up they found the mana (food) that they needed in order to sustain life. They onyl had enough for that day and just had to trust that their would be mana the next day.

In addition to this trust that we need to have in Christ while we live here on this earth there is also a commision, a task, an objective for our lives. In this instance it is worded like this.

"When you enter a town and are welcomed, eat what is se before you. Heal the sick who are there and tell them, "The Kingdom of God is near you."."

I think there are several important messages here; first when we enter a place where we are welcomed Christ calls us to put trust in the people there and use the things they offer in order to sustain the ministry there, second we are told to heal the sick. It doesn't say how the people may be afflicted just that we are supposed to heal them. The question them arrises "How are we to heal sick people?" Well the answer to this lies in that Christ is empowering the people he sends out with His power. As messengers for Christ we have in us His spirit, his power, and his will. Like parable of the Mustard Seed we need only have faith and nothing is impossible for us. The third thing we are called to do in this verse is to preach of the Kingdom of God. It is our job as stewards of the knowledge of Christ to share that knowledge with others. We don't have to be special people with unusual knowledge or skills, we don't need to be trained or instructed in how to be effective, we need only a genuine love for Christ and a relationship with him. I am not saying that there aren't ways to better utilize the gifts God has given us, but what I am saying is that all we need to do in order to participate in Gods purpose for our lives is to offer ourselves to Him for his work.

In conclusion I would like to say that this is not an average quiet time for me. I don't usually get all this from one or 2 verses and even rarer do I have the urge to share all this with people. In fact I am quiet self concious and unsure of what I really understand. In any case I hope anyone that reads this looks into for themselves, you never know how God can speak to you through scripture. I am off to bed now, but I hope you all have a wonderful day and enjoy finding out more about the Lord yourselves, as the host of Reading Rainbow alwasy said, "Don't take my word for it."

In Him,
matt

As the Pace Quickens

Today was my first official day leading Young Life. I think it was highly successful, actually it was justa good day. I woke up today and drove to Colrain High School home of the State Football Champion Colrain Cardinoles where I watched a wrestling match between Colrain, Mt Healthy, Anderson, Turpin, Fairborn, and my personal almamater and winner today Princeton. while I was there I got to meet some of the wrestlers on the Mt Healthy team as well as see a bunch of my friends that are still in high school. At about 11:45 I drove my Co-leader Brandon to a car shop where he got his car fixxed and then drove him home. At that point I went to my Grandma's house ate lunch and took a nap (the awesome part). When I woke up the UC game was just ending and I found out that my team had blown a 17 point lead to Louisville. So then I went home and ate dinner with my dad. My dad wasn't expecting me so he didn't really have any food in the house for me, being the improvisor that I am I ate soem Chicken noodle soup and left for the Mt Healthy basketball game against who else but Colrain. When I arrived at Brandon's house to carpool I was informed that the game had been reshcedualed and had already taken place earlier that day. However we still went and hung out with some other people from the school and went to Grater's. I love Black-Rasberry-Chip ice cream. After tat I got home and now I am about to go to sleep (another awesome part) until 9 when I will wake up and go to church. I was praying tonight about Leading during my quiet time and was lead to the sending out of the 72 disciples in Luke Chapter 10 (actually I didn't know where ti was and had to look it up). I am really excited about being a worker in the fields of God harvesting people for him. it had a reference in my bible to Matthew 10 where Jesus sends out the 12 there is even more information abotu startign a ministry there. Thats about all that happened today, if you can't tell I am really excited. God bless you all and may you have a wonderful day too.

in Him
matt

Mt. Healthy Owls Part One

Today I was placed as a Young Life Leader. I couldn't possibly be happier with the place where I have been sent to lead. At Mount Healthy High School there are a ton of things that I so excited about. first is the team I am going to be leading with. Brandon is like a spiritual father to me and a great friend in Christ. He is always there for me with an example to follow and advice when I am confused. Second is his now fiance` Carrie. She is a really cool person who is wonderfully suited to Brandon and to Christ. She is a powerful soldier for God and actively seeks and carries out His will in her life. I am so excited to learn and grow in the presence of these amazing people. In addition to that there was another new leader placed at Mt. Healthy, her name is Mary Kay. I don't yet know very much about her except that she has a great personality and is incredibly strong in her faith. I know that her brother died tragically at a young age and that she is the strength in her family. In addition to the people I am leading with there is also the good aspects about the place I am leading. Mt. Healthy is a poor neighborhood with an even poorer school system. it is a cultural smelting pot of all kinds of people with many different kinds of back grounds. The equilizer for everyone is more or lack there of in this case. I know God has given me this opportunity not just to share Him, but to help these kids in practical ways. It doesn't matter to me if I have a spiritual impact on these kids or not, that is God business to worry about, I am only there to offer everything I have in the name of Christ. If people should see Christ through my loving them that is all the more wonderful. I fully expect to be tested as well as grow tremendously through this experience. Tomorrow I plan on going to the wrestling match at Colrain High School. I am so anxious to get my hands dirty and begin to build a ministry in the school. I can't wait to meet kids and start developing relationships. Most of all I am excited for all the ways God is making himself evident in my life. he is surrounding me with himself and teaching me, molding me into his child, his servant. I just can't wait for tomorrow.

in Him
matt

I Know You Wait For Me in the Quiet That Follows the Storm...

Lately I am so convicted to strenghten myself in Christ. With that I am so thankful for the current time of ease in my life for renewal. Usually I am stretched or being tested or hurt, but currently everything is just happening. Its seem my life is in slow motion and I can finaly keep up. I am especially thankful for these times in my life because it gives me the opportunity to renew myself and rest before the next storm. I know that it is impossible to live on the mountain for it is only a place to come and be filled. Soon comes the time where I will be called on by Christ to go down and pour myself out for people. Tomorrow I get placed as a Young Life Leader. I am excited, as most people are, but at the same time I am confronted with the knowledge that this means I will be asked to give all of myself and rely solely on Christ for support. In the past when I have trusted Christ to sustain me he has never let me down and I know he wont this time either, but what I haven't yet figured out is how to make the transition more easily. It always seems like I come to the brink of my existance before Christ comes in and saves the day, and up to that point it is always very uncomfortable. It could be that I don't really rely on Christ all the time for my daily bread and strength, and when I absolutely have to I need to be in desperate need of help. If I where 100% dependant on Christ all the time there would never be a period of transition, I would never be completely empty. On the other side of this I know that God is strongest in my greastest weakness's. By offering myself to Him unconditionaly for His purposes alone He will be glorified in everything I do, both my successes and my failures. I am confident that God will use me in ways I probably won't even know. I am so excited to see all the places God will take me and look forward to becoming a man of God. So heres to the next step in an endless walk, may it be the greatest yet.

In Him,
matt

The Return of Gretchen

Today when I arrived home driving my Mom's car once again I was surprised at the fact that my car was still missing. gretchen has been in the hospital for 2 days at this point and I am begingin to panic. When I entered the house I found my sister at her usual post in front ot the computer. I don't know what it is that drives teenage girls so crazy about instant messenger, but its like a magnite. I asked her where my mom was and that was all it took for her to snap. She went off on me for not listening when mom said she "wouldn't be home until late," last night. I calmly responded that I didn't ask what time she would be home, but "where she was." To that Katie replied "I don't know." "Get out." So I went to the living room to watch LOST on ABC. I absolutely love that show. I mean it is one of the greatest shows ever. When my mom finaly got home I was playing guitar. She said she had my car and asked if I had eaten dinner. I was overjoyed at the idea of a healthy car again so I told her we would go to Skyline. I Haven't eaten there in quite some time. When I got home from Skyline Katie was still consumed by the cathode ray. So wrapped up another day in the life of Me. Other notes from today include; Meagan (phsyco from the dorms) called me and wanted to hang out tomorrow to which I replied I'll have to see how tomorrow goes, I am even more excited by the fact that I start leading Young Life on Friday, I got to eat lunch with my friends again which I love because they are sucha a good influence on me, I got 5 hours of work in, and soon I will be going to bed for nearly 7 hours. That will be the most sleep I've gotten in quite some time. So onwards and upwards for now. God Bless you all. Oh also I have a prayer request, I really need to be humble over the next few weeks, I mean its always a good thing to be , but especially now as I am building new peoples impressions of me. Thanks so much everyone.

In Him,
matt

Disaster Strikes

OK, the worst thing happened to me yesterday on my drive home from school. I was merrily riding along when I noticedthat it was mildly warm in my car. Noticing this I made the executive decision to crak my windwo a bit and let in some fresh air. Well when I hit the window down button in my car my window fell right out of place down into my car door. So I had to drive the rest of the way home with the window all the way down, I froze and I was soking wet. So today I take it to the shop before school, when I got home the diagnosis was that they dont make parts for my car anymore. So the mechanic guy found some at a junk yard and put them on my car or will tomorrow I can pick it up at noon. God only knows how much it will cost. Man I Hate My Car. So that was just plain awful. Ok now on to my first request, Mr Logic teacher day 2. Today I don't really have to much because he put me to sleep like adhd medication. What I did see of him though was his corteroy brown-green sports coat over a white shirt with an oriental design tie tied to about half way down his chest. If you've ever watched Zach Morris and crew on Bayside picture the 58 year old version of the captian nerd. basically what he did today was disprove all the stuff he tought us on the first day I think though, I am probably less confused for sleeping. One last thing, tonight I was helping my sister with her Chemistry for a test tomorrow and I noticed this one problem she had was just impossible so when I found out her proffessor has AIM I asked him about it. He was wrong... ok so it made me feel good. Goodnight everyone have a great day.

In Him,
matt

I Found The Missing Box

Ok, so last night I looked in a pot in the basement of my Mom's house where she said she had looked already, and low and behold there was the hidden treasure. How it got there will only lead to pointing fingers and hurt feelings, but the important thing is that my life is once again right side out. I found out there was more stuff in the box than I orginally thought. I fouund my lifes colcion of favorite vs on notecards (hundreds), about 15 cds, software tools to go wth my tetbooks, and a few other things. even my favorite kind of toothpaste. After that I got to shave which I haven't done in over a week. It felt so good!!! So thn I set my actual alarm clock and it actually woke me up today. That may sound a little obvious, but really it was a refreshing experiene to say the least. Today at lunch I bought the jumbo sized drink because I had packed my own lunch, 2 pb&js, 2 clemantines, chips (baked), and vanilla waffers. So the drink was 44 ounzes which ws a lot, but being the american that I am I had to get the refill to go just on principle. I drank that whole thing while I was in my next two classes. As I write this guess what I have to do right now... Anyways I am pretty excited about this week because I gt placed as a Young Life Leader. It is somewhat suspenceful waiting to see where I will get placed, espeially because several people in the city (all girls) expressed openly that they would be very upset if I go placed on their team. Oh well, I didn't want to work with them anyways. (not rue it mostly just hurt my feelings) Now I am going to go to the bathroom and drive home to Milford where I will be taking the most glorious nap of my life. I hope you alll enjoy todays DAILY post.

In Him,
matt

Skiing and Football

If you haven't yet learned that I love to play most sports, I want you to know I love to play most sports. That said I would like to offer an apology for not posting yesterday in addition to an explination for my lazyness. Yesterday morning I woke up and went to work. I worked from 9:30 to 12:30 at which point I drove to my Dad's house to get my skis. Me and some of my friends from school and Young Life went to Perfect North Slopes. We got an 8 hour lift pass starting at 3:25. Now I know how to ski, but I am by no means a great skier. In any case I had a great time but didn't get home until 12:30 and I was whooped. I took a shower and went straight to bed. I didn't make it to church today because I slept until 11:30. In my defence I think the Lord wanted me to rest...Ok I didn't even believe that myself...So I am lazy sue me. So far today has been an awesome day. I woke up made myself some eggs and ate alone in an empty house. Then I cleaned up a little and turned on the football game. I am only mildly sore today from all the skiing yesterday, which I sort of enjoy. Its the feeling that I have done something other than just be lazy. I mean its real exercise vs just normal life stuff. Anyways the Colts just finished off the Broncoes and now I am hungry again so I think this is going to have to be it for today. Hope you've enjoyed reading this

In Him
matt

Somethings Lost That Must Be Found!!!

Today started off late but great. I turned off my alarm at 6:45 and went right back to sleep. When I woke up at ten I decided to skip the only class I could have made it to still. Genetic Biology can't be all that hard anyways. At about 12 o-clock I decided I should at least do something today. So I started unpacking all my stuff from my dorm (I am no longer living on campus). Nearing the end of this adventure I still hadn't come across my box of "small things," and unfortunately as your get older the most important things in your life tend to get smaller. Well as it turns out I still haven't found that box. things that where in that box that are very important include, but are not limited to: my razor and shaving cream, toothbrush (don't worry i have another), checkbook, "Mere Christianity" by C. S. Lewis, my ping pong paddles and a few balls, two stress balls, possibly a Nalgene, and surely something else I will find invaluable. Well my mom found out what I was looking for, and now she is major stressing out about it because of my checkbook. What she doesn't realize is that I am in college and there isn't anythign to steal in the first place. So I do hope to find it because of the razor its been a week since i shaved and its getting rough. I would also really like to have the Ping Pong stuff too. Also I got asked if I wanted to go skiing tomorrow. That is awesome except that it isn't supposed to be cold and because I know I have to work but I don't know what time. So that leaves me with a lot of open ends. Also I am a huge fan of the NFL and would really like to watch the wild card games tomorrow. Unfortunately that seems to be getting lower and lower on the list of things to do. Tonight was cool because I got to eat Larosa's Pizza which is my absolute favorite. In addition to that I had three Cokes my favorite pop. Now as I laeve to go to bed I am happy and full. Only one other thing looms in the back of my mind. Tonight in my quiet time I discovered something quite disconcerting. In Mark 13 there is a mention that the heavenly bodies will tremble as the end times approach. I personally am not one to make something out of nothing and am in no way saying that the enourmous earthquake/tidal wave in Asia is a foreshadow to the coming of Christ, but I am confronted with a new urgency to spread the Gospel of Christ. So to all of you reading this spread gospel spread. But seriously it is staggaring to think that every day really could be the last. I am not worried about my personal salvation as I am very secure in that, but I do worry that I miss opportunities to show Christ to people. I hope you may realize and fully take advantage of these situations as well. So I think that's it for tonight I hope you havea great night.

In Him,
matt

Showing Others

Ok, I am writing this just to show my Mom how to Blog. I bet in the end she will end up just as fanatical as I am. So here goes my most fabulous post of the new year.

Choosing to Respect Women

Recently it was pointed out to me that I am mean to girls. I don't say that in a sense that I was rude I was just down mean to girls. I have been so focused on not falling in Love again, as that was a huge distraction from Christ for me, not to mention that I am only 18 years old and don't need to be in love in the first place, that i went to far in the other direction. I generally treat girls as unimportant parts of my life, which may or may not be true, but that gives me no right to treat them as if they don't exist. A while ago I read "Wild at Heart" by John Eldridge and he talks of how a man of christ is called to live and part of that is their relationship with women. Not only are we as men called to have upstanding sexual boundaries in the sight of God and man, but we are called to be soldiers and even knights fighting for women. I don't mean that in the sense that we should fight every fight for every girl, but I do mean that we should be chivalrous. As I grow older and am placed in a mentor's role in front of people younger than me particularly boys it is critical that I learn to respect and honor women. I need to set a positive example for the people that look up to me so that they too know how to act around girls. Hopefully one day I'll marry one, and I'll need all the training I can get as far as how to build them up. Encourage one another in brotherly love also applies to sisters. So I guess this is an apology of sorts for the way I have disrespected a gender. Hopefully I will make good progress toward becoming a better man of Christ. I guess this means its back to walkings on my tip toes around girls like i am in the 7th grade all over.

In other news, today was my first day of Intoductory to Logic. It is the most rediculus thing i have ever heard in my life. to start with my proffessor os the mad scientist. he comes into class today with a checkered sports coat on fromt he late 70s and a pink collared shirt with a red tie tied with the skinny part to long. he proceeds to rant for an hour and 15 minutes about how red roses are red by accident but that they intentionally transfer that redness through the air to our hearts where all our thinking processes are caried out. furthuremore when we see and interpret the rose as red we are assuming the form of the rose, it seems we have to or we wouldnt be able to interpret it at all. ----am i starting to sound mad scientisty yet--- so anyways this clown goes on and on and i dont think anyone there got a single thing out of it except happier that they are who they are and not this guy. it was all i could do to keep a straight face. oh well i think that is enough for tonight surely no one canmake it through all of this anyways. Have a wonderful evening and god bless.

in Him
matt

Logical Solution

Today was a very long day. It started at 6:30 when I woke and dressed for my daily adventure accross most of the county. The drive to school took about 40 minutes and the walk to class through the rain took another 10. Upon arriving there, my day of sitting through classes I probably could get by in without showing up continued till 2 o-clock when I left school to go to work. As I opened the door on my car it slowly tapped into the passenger mirror of the car next to me. Of course a deffening alarm went off, so I casually steped into my car and drove off. At work I got a lot done until some of the high schoolers in the youth group at the church I work at wanted me to play football with them in the gym. So of course I did. It was a lot of fun except that I had the wrong socks on or something because now I have huge blisters. In any case I left work at 10 till 7 and drove home. my mom made me two cheeseburgers, baked beans, fries, and soup. It was so good i was a lot hungrier than I originally thought. Then I watched Lost on ABC I really like that show. Tomorrow I have my first quiz of the quarter. That should be exciting. Oh well. Oh and I got aresponce from a nice Vietnamiese man who is fighting for christ at the risk of losing his life. He is truely an amazing soldier for the Lord. Also today I registered for another class to fill in for the English that the College wouldnt let me sign up for. Introductry to Logic. I don't yet really know what it is, but I have heard that the proffessor is crazy and claims to have conclusive evidence for aleins. This should be hilarious. Oh well time for bed hope to hear from someone.

In Him
Matt

Finding Love

Today i was reminded anew that there are people in my life that love me genuinely and truely. In the past year I have learned better to identify real love because it was first shown to me by christ. As i make the transition from childhood to adult I am learning many things about responsibility, loyalty and friendship but it is so refreshing. I hope that everyone has an opportunity in life to experience the love that I am surrounded by. In Him Matt

Back to school

So today school resumed for me as it did for hundreds of thousands of young people all over the country today. I had to wake up really early because i am living at home this quarter which is good and bad. The good is that i get to shop at the store and make food and sleep in my own bed and not deal with roomate roulet, the bad is that I have to drive 35 minutes through traffic to school everyday and then walk a half mile from my garage to my classes. This was especially unfortunate today because it was raining. In any case i made it to class which was just another few hours of older people telling younger people how much more they know than them, and why it is imortant that we as young people try to attain there great wisdom. I think thats fairly standard of a first day of classes at any level of teaching anywhere in the world. After struggling through the red tape of actually paying the university I wearily made my way home to cook and eat. The rest of my night consisted of attempting to learn how to play my guitar (the best christmas present i ever got), and watching the sugar bowl which turned out bitter for VT. Now that i have nearly completed my first ever "Blog" I am off to have a quiet time and sleep for a few hours before I wake to try again. If anyone makes it through all of this i congradulate you, and I would love to get feedback that would be an enormous encouragement.

In Him
Matt